Episode 6: The Dead Baby Club with Jess Southwood

Today’s conversation is with one of my closest friends Jess Southwood. Unlike my other guests who work in the realm of spirituality, Jess is a Business consultant and facilitator, with a particular focus on leadership development, team dynamics and creativity in business. But honestly, I didn’t invite her to talk to me about her work, though it is fascinating and has taken her all over the world. I didn’t invite Jess to talk because she loves yoga and writing and poetry. I invited Jess here because we share something in common—we re both bereaved mothers. We “met” in 2009, after our second daughters were stillborn. And through our grief, we both sought community on the internet and through starting our own blogs about grief and mothering. We were both writerly and creative and irreverent and formed an immediate and all-encompassing bond. I wrote at a blog called Still life with Circles, and she wrote at a blog called afteriris and then we both were invited to write for the Literary Hub Glow in the Woods, founded by Kate Inglis as a place to write more literarily about what Kate titled babyloss. I later became the editor for a few years. We spent time in person together, and have maintained our friendship for the last 11 years, growing together and experiencing more of us. I wanted to talk to Jess about sisterhood, spiritual bonding, emotional intimacy, grieving publicly, and you know, dead babies. We say that quite a bit in this episode. We talk about it bluntly, like you find in the community of grieving women on the internet. There is a whole community. Most people who have never lost a child have no idea there is a corner of the internet where women talk about the death of their baby—over and over again. We write stories and exchange emails and have an entire community of bereaved mothers and fathers. Jess is an extraordinary woman. I feel so blessed to have her as one of my best friends. As you can hear from our conversation, she is deeply thoughtful, funny, intelligent, self-aware and interesting. Jess’ s first collection of poetry can be found at littlelosses.com. She has a Masters degree in Shakespeare Studies from the Shakespeare Institute in Stratford-upon-Avon. She lives in Birmingham, UK, with her husband, three children, two cats, one dog, and too many books. I hoe you enjoy my conversation with Jess Southwood.

My grief blog: http://stilllifewithcircles.blogspot.com

Jess’s first poetry collection: https://littlelosses.com/

Glow in the Woods: http://www.glowinthewoods.com/

We mentioned a few things in this podcast including the Right Where I Am Project.

First year: http://stilllifewithcircles.blogspot.com/p/right-where-i-am-project.html

The last year I did this: http://stilllifewithcircles.blogspot.com/2014/07/right-where-i-am-five-years-and-almost.html

Kate Inglis who coined the term Babyloss’s writing: http://www.kateinglis.com/

Kara Chipoletti Jones https://linktr.ee/griefandcreativity

Niobe and Dead Baby Jokes: her blog

Niobe’s GITW posts: http://www.glowinthewoods.com/blog/tag/Niobe

Angie’s GITW posts: http://www.glowinthewoods.com/blog/tag/Angie

Jess’s GITW posts: http://www.glowinthewoods.com/blog/tag/Jess