How were your holiday gatherings? One of my Tarot friends sent me this hilarious cartoon for Thanksgiving, combining two things I love--laughing and Tarot. I have a great family and enjoy them very much. This was not always the way--my extended family dinners as a child seemed more like a blood sport. People leaving drunk and crying, yelling, dramatics, drinking, accusations. No one seemed to like each other, and I vowed as an adult to not be this way.
Holidays can be fraught with emotions--joy, grief, hurt, expectation, anxiety, sadness, loneliness--then add complicated family and friend relationships, and it is a formula for deep trauma. As I thought about this, I wondered how I would want to help my clients navigate the holiday family gatherings with my clients if they came to me for a Tarot reading. And I thought about how often in relationship disputes, I cannot see the trees through the forest. So, I created a Tarot Layout for Healing Friendships, Relationships & Family Dynamics. I created it so you can go deeper with shifting tension, for seeing a new perspective and for finding a way forward. I focused this layout on the person asking the question, because we can really only change us, right?
I think it would be useful to consider the cards that arise in certain positions. There are some relationships in which there is no path forward--this rift is permanent and important. Pay attention to the people on the card--is it a solitary person, or two people? Are you seeing cards of withdrawal or protection? Remembering that sometimes you are not at fault in the slightest, so how you move forward needs to be considered with that in mind. I'm going to print some of these out for Tarot Share, though it might not lend itself to a great group reading. This is really about our individual work with another person.
Past Life Relationship Spread
As a Tarot Reader, I am privy to the most interesting questions. People often come to me in places of confusion about their relationships--marriages, lovers, clandestine affairs, friendships, frenemies, parental/child relationships, co-workers. When we feel strong emotions on either end of the spectrum, we know something important is happening within the relationship. Deep wounds AND deep healing come from relationships.
There is no mistake that the Lovers card of the Major Arcana features Archangel Raphael over the lovers (the Devil's dark card comes from the same imagery as the Lovers), and that in the Minor Arcana, the Two of Cups, has the Caduceus--the two snakes wrapped around the staff of Hermes has represented Medicine and Healing for a long long time.
At times, healing in relationship confounds us. We don't always understand why someone provokes such strong reactions in us. Why someone's benign comment leads us to anger and another person's same comment sounds comforting. Or why we continue to attract and have the same types of relationships. Or why no matter how much therapy or talking or healing we do, we cannot repair the relationship with our mother, or father. When we get to the end of the line, we often ask questions like "What am I missing here? What is my lesson with this person? Do I have past life karma with this person?" People ask this if they feel deep, immediate love and connection for someone and if they feel the other extreme--revulsion, anger or deep hurt.
This layout came about after a reading with a friend of mine. She asked me what her past life relationship was with her husband. They had been together for over twenty years. She wondered why she felt so obligated to the marriage and to him. She asked if we could find this out via the Tarot Cards.
Sure. Why not? I had never asked such a question of the Tarot before, but the Celtic Cross is incredibly versatile. As I laid it out, I began changing the meanings of the positions and moving some of the cards around. After I was done, I realize I had naturally created a sacred spiral. I had done another reading like this connecting with someone's passed over loved one (I'll post this layout soon). In crystal gridding, I use a spiral for past life grids, to open to the deep knowledge within, like unscrewing a lid of the jar to view the past life.
We have done this spread many times in Tarot Share, playing with questions for each other to see how this layout works. One night, we did this for everyone at Tarot Share, looking at our past life karma with each other. It was fascinating to find out that when we ask about those people who have created deep love and deep anger/resentment/fear, we often get lots of Major Arcana cards. We see archetypes. We see reversals (lots of reversals). We see a spiritual journey, suffering. Do not be surprised if you see these kinds of things in this layout. It may be disturbing, but it also validates that the strong emotions you feel. Major Arcana always deals with soul journey. When we would read for each other (people who get along and often only interact during Tarot Share), we had all Minor Arcana and not too many reversals. It is not that we didn't share a past life, but that it was easy and light, and often in the context of a village or family environment where our souls and soul work is more removed from each other.
In the best case, these cards reveal their deep past life meanings to us easily during this layout. It can be hard to discern exactly what is going on in Past Life readings, but try to expand on what you already know of the card. And have fun playing with this layout. Comment here or on one of the social media platforms where I share this layout about how it worked for you. I'd love to hear!
